Well, if you were too busy on Sunday hunting, or watching football, "snowmachine riding" or raising your many kids, we are happy to inform you that the Treasury took control (Reuters) of Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac yesterday via many mechanisms including the creation of a special class of preferred shares that can be used to inject capital into the institutions; apparently they had a poor grasp of capital requirements and now we the people own it... sorta. In any case, this just reminds us during this national financially delicate moment of historic proportions, we hardly need presidential or vice presidential candidates with legal experience, analytical abilities, or things like Harvard degrees (with all the intellectual stimulation that goes into getting one of them there things). McCain's Palin should have us thoroughly reassured that she will barracuda our troubles away, even if those troubles include a 6.1% unemployment rate, the highest level in 5 years (NYT).
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In light of the above economic news, Joe Klein at Time Magazine asks us what the election is about, concluding that Republicans are shifting the national conversation to, in our words, stupid stuff. (We are as conservative as they come, but aside from potential judicial appointments, we hardly see anything worthy in presidential candidate McCain, who has so many faces that he can see the north and south poles simultaneously).
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The N.Y. Times brings us buyout godfather Henry Kravis as he attempts to take his firm, K.K.R., public by merging it with a troubled affiliate, thus killing a couple of vexing birds with one stone. We are all suffering now and just trying to pull together.
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The NFL began its season in full with all the teams we want to win (and pardon our biases), winning. This group included the Philadelphia Eagles, the Pittsburgh Steelers, and Indy (oops, not Indy). The New England Patriots won, but lost quarterback Brady for the season, so, they really lost.
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Ah, the harmonious mix of politics and music. Having succeeded in appropriating the song "Barracuda" by the band Heart for Sarah Palin to use as her theme song and ode to non-intellectualism, the McCain team defended their right to use the stuff of people who don't like them. The Wilson sisters spoke out against the thievery but the McCainites insist their use is legal, and have gone on to appropriate Obama's theme of change in a fit of kleptomania.
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And just in case your Monday is off to a nifty start, you are not losing money on financial stocks, your mortgage bill is current, your job is secure, and your life is just peachy, this is the news for you. CERN, (European Organization for Nuclear Research), is ready to turn on its huge supercollider "Adam" smasher thingie. If U.S. vice presidential candidate Sarah Barracuda proves correct, and God did in fact make the world in 7 days or so, give or take translation errors, then things are cool around.
But if somehow a big bang type of event occurred, the itch of scientists to replicate that event might kill us all dead, although, presumably, seconds before it all ends, we will say to ourselves, "Ah, so that's how it all began". According to AP, we have another month or so before they start firing beams of protons at each other. Some people are trying to stop the effort under the crazy rationale that scientists could create something of unknown and deadly consequence, like micro black holes, but we figure if that happens, Geneva, where the collider is based, and then Europe, will be the first to be sucked in, leaving the United States with more hegemony in its mental pocket. (Hegemony being a fine substitute for actual money in the national piggy bank).
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We wonder if Freddie and Fannie are sitting there outside Paulson's office, and blaming each other for messing up. Happy Monday!
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Wisdom for the Day:
When a woman you have an interest in starts talking about some guy you never heard of, and describes him as "ugly" or "annoying," or if she says things like "Oh my god I am so not interested in him", and if she says these things over the course of an hour instead of talking about more interesting things like the end of the world or collapsing mortgage institutions, flee. Don't look back. Your heart will surely turn into a rock of salt as she eventually tells you a month later, "No really, he is the most delightful man ever!"
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